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Quit Procrastinating I - Defragging Your Brain

TRACKING YOUR RECURRING OBSTACLES
If there’s something that’s always taken me far too long to accomplish (aka procrastinate), the core cause has nearly always been because of a really tough obstacle blocking me. It’s the equivalent of a brick wall - a truly serious block which can at times - truly scare the bloody fucking shit out of me. I’ve had some mighty paralysing obstacles in my day, and still do. I’ve come to realise that it’s incredibly normal to be scared of things like this. Everyone’s going to be scared of something, at some point.

The difference between now and back then - is that i’m better able to to understand and know that i’m facing obstacle when i confront one getting in the way of getting things done. By seeing the obstacle, i can then confront the breaking down of that barrier in my path.

Obstacles are like a noose around the neck. They can be exceptionally suffocating and can cut off the circulation of your project or thing-to-get done. They have the power to stop and get in the way of you achieving your dreams.

If your regular to-do-list isn’t quite working for you, give it a small twist at the end. Here’s an excerpt of what my weekly & daily planner looked like:

Notice that small section at the bottom? I used that space to review the day and list the reasons & excuses for why I couldn’t do the certain things I had set myself up for the day to achieve.

I had all the 7 days listed on one page and began to document the reasons for why i couldn’t get certain things done on the list. After practising this for several weeks, i began to notice my “recurring obstacles” and even moreso after a few months. Tasks of a particular nature - which i always found really difficult to overcome began to manifest in the form of recurring themes of things that i always had trouble with (and still do with some to this very day).

One of the primary examples that comes immediately to mind - was sending invoices to my client in order to get paid for my design work. It used to get so bad that i would have weeks of accumulated invoices not done. Not good at all.

The postal service in my former town at the time, had stroppy & very unpleasant sales folks. A matter of pot luck as to whether or not you would score a good or a bad person at the counter. To compound this problem further, my son (now diagnosed with autism) - couldn’t stand waiting in queues and there was always something acutely terrifying for him when it was time to approach a “counter” of anykind. It was acutely difficult for us to manage, so my husband & I would have to “tag team” when it came to getting the banking/shopping & any other kind of day-to-day life transaction that involved people standing behind any kind of counter. With my husband working a “9-9″ high-stress corporate job at the time, gaining access to the post office was near to impossible for me because they weren’t open on the weekends.

Week after week - my list saw the line up of;

“Write up invoice no.xyz” …and it wouldn’t get done. Used to have several attempts in a week too, often failing!

Anything which had a task dealing with needing to visit the post office to get things mailed - was always left undone. It was simply too hard.

By seeing this recurring problem in my life on my to do lists in this fashion - it made me realise that sending out invoices & dealing with the post office was naturally, a really difficult task for me to overcome. This didn’t make me stupid or bad - it was just something that didn’t come to me easily or naturally. Some people are better at doing things than others. When it came to visiting the post office, the job was too daunting, far too horrible & unpleasant for me. That’s why it had a habit of pushing itself to the bottom of my priority list all the time.

After doing the exercise over several months, i began to realise the commonly recurring things that i always had trouble with. I could see the “brick walls” very clearly - and this helped me to develop strategies to make it “less painful” for myself by confronting the reasons for why i found facing such brick walls were so difficult.

The way in which i tried to lessen the burden of this particular problem;

- I dared to speak to my client, asking her if it was ok to send my invoices via email instead of snail mail. She was perfectly ok with it! It made things more efficient for both of us, so it was a remarkable win/win.

- I organised to buy postage stamps & envelopes in bulk to save me from needing to check-in to the post office in person.

This didn’t eliminate the difficulty of such tasks for me entirely, but it did release a fair degree of the burden I used to carry. With time, i also slowly began to confront my client by daring to assert my own boundaries more clearly in small bites too, in order to make it less painful for me to deal with her.

My weekends were never respected and work always had to be done “urgently”. Being paired with the “disease to please”, this didn’t make things any easier for me! I had to re-state that i would no longer work on weekend about 2-3 times before it finally registered, but i also implemented other strategies. I stopped accepting any work on Fridays and stopping my pathetic habit of promising to deliver work on Mondays too. The latter was far more effective in getting the message across. It was an incredibly effective strategy of not commiting myself to anything unreasonable with a weekend living in the middle of it! I also managed to dare to renegotatiate my rate as well - a very confronting task for me - but again, something that could only be done in small tiny steps. I was thrilled how the small changes & strategies i took on in my life earnt further respect of my time & personal space. Writing up invoices became much easier after that. They got done every week…

As for dealing with the post office these days? Things changed miraculously for me when i moved to Leura a little over a year ago. My goodness - the people at the post office here - they’re so bloody nice, helpful & friendly! It’s perfectly ok for me to ask them questions about the services, they’re more than happy to help by explaining the processes to me! They never make me feel like a burden or a nuisance for simply asking questions to understand how things work! Another one of my recurring obstacles(problems) - is asking other people for help. I’m not very good at it. Actually, i suck quite bad at it.

My son also learnt how to handle his terror of facing people standing behind counters too, so it’s now a great pleasure to go to the post office and other places that involve people standing behing counters. 555. So much for a change in suburb which has finally tackled one hell of an obstacle my life used to face with such a job before. Great customer service certainly goes a long way for me.

Anywayz - one of the first keys to tackling the procrastination thing, is to realise that you’re facing an obstacle when it hits you. I was unable to see them clearly, until i began to document my excuses for not getting things done. I was blind as a bat before that.

By reviewing my list excuses, each one had a certain “feeling” attached to it when i read them. These days, i know i’m facing an obstacle because of how it makes me feel. If i experience a suffocating “glug”, I know i’m facing a brick wall and my challenge is to pull out my axe and smash that wall into smaller & more achievable pieces - but I’ll write in more detail on that with my next piece!

As diaries don’t come with the “excuse” section, feel free to use my following PDFs if you’re unable to make up a chart yourself. HIH.

Weekly Planner
7 Days To A Week Planner

I used the weekly planner to list up my goals for the week, and would then translate them into the 7day chart. It was very useful for me to track how things didn’t get done on a per week basis vs per day. The process made me realise just how over ambitious i was with my goal setting, which is another common problem that functions as the source of procrastination for me - so more on that later too!

Thats it for tonight, so i’m taking a break. Goodnight!